You Can Start Right Now

The first day of spring (here in North America) brings another opportunity for people to look forward to positive change. If you haven't set your goals for 2012, or if you have but are struggling, please read this classic essay from Michael Masterson to get you started on your journey.

Craig Ballantyne

"If you don't design your own life plan, chances are you'll fall into someone else's plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much." - Jim Rohn

죽은 자는 말이 없다.그러할지라도 죽은 자는존재해 있다죽은 자는 산 자를 위해 아무것도 해 줄 수가 없다. 그러나 죽은 자는거기 그 곳에 존재해 있다. 품위있게 근엄하게 성스럽기까지하도록 지정된 화장터자례식장 어디 보자 누가 누가 왔나 모였나. 어, 그 넘도 왔네 뭐야 저년도 왔잖아. 여긴 나의 장례식장. 살아 있는 이들은 내가 같이 함께 존재해 전체 속에 있는 것을 모른다. 그러나 죽은 나는 이들을 안다 이들을 듣는다 이들 모두를 본다 이들 전부를인식한다 그리고 느낀다. "죽은 사람에겐 ㅗㅎ은 말 하라지만 이 친구 정말 지독한 친구였었지, 남을 착취하면서 살았지" "이 분 다른 사람을 위해 남모으게 얼마나 서행을 많이했는지 몰라요" 좋은평 나쁜펴 별별 얘기를 죽은 내귀로 다 듣고 죽은 눈으로 다 본다. 달려가서 귀사데기를 때려주고 싶으나 죽은 내가 할 수 있는 것이 없다.

나의장례식 그대의장례식 우리들의 장례식에 모인 가족친지지린들이 어떤 평가를 해주기를 바라는가.죽은 내가 듣고 기분 나쁘다면 난 그 말을 한 사람에게또 사람과의 관계에서 잘못살았다는 종결적 사실이다. 더 이상 고칠 수 없는 선언적 심판적 최종적 결론이 되어버린다. 이런 잘못 산 섦, 잘못된 삶이 우주의 비문에 철필로 각인되기 전에 자신을 바로 세워봄이 어떨까. 리게 또한 성공의 원칙이기도하다.

평소의 자신의 행동과의식을 한번 자세히 드러다보면 자신이 정말로 중요하다고, 가치있다고 생각하고 있는 것이 무엇인지를 알게 된다. 자신의 장례식에 온 저명인사가 "이 친그 재산이 구백조가 넘는다"라는 말에 기분이 좋다면 그대의 중요가치 삶의 핵심은 금전재산이다. "아 이친구 88살에도 부부관계를 일주일에 한 번씩이가졌다더군 그것도 아주 격렬하게말이아" 이 얘기에 흐므솬 표정이라면 그대의 삶의 핵심엑기스는 건강이다. 나의 핵심관심 사항을 알면 성공점 목표설정 도달점설정은 용이해지고 이 설정은 사라질 염려도 별로 없을 뿐만 아니라성취 또한 그만큼 빨라진다

One More Thing Before Setting Your Long-Term Goals: Figure Out Your Core Values

By Michael Masterson

Before you can jump feet first into master planning your life, you have one more job to do: Figure out what's really important to you.

Most people you meet on the street don't like their jobs, are unhappy with their family life, and want more money. They believe that if they could just do this or that, everything would be better.

Winning the lottery would make it all okay. At least that's what they think. But the truth is otherwise. Unless you live your life according to your core values, no success will be enough to bring you joy.

So before you attempt to set your goals, you have to spend 15 minutes figuring out your core values. What do I mean by core values? I mean the feelings you have about good and evil that are buried deep within your heart.

What does goal setting have to do with core values? It's all about insuring your long-term happiness. If you set goals that contradict your core values, you will wake up one day and say, "I did everything I said I wanted to do. But so what?"

You don't want to end up being yet another highly successful but fundamentally miserable person – a fate so common it's become a cliche. Here's how to make sure that doesn't happen...

Begin by imagining a funeral. It is taking place in an elegantly appointed room. The room is full of friends and family members who have assembled to talk about the deceased. You look around. You begin to recognize faces. "Who is the deceased?" you wonder. You look at the casket. Good God, it's you!

So what are the people at your funeral saying about you?

Imagine specific people: a parent, a sibling, a neighbor, a business associate, and even a stranger. Don't be vague about this. Think about individual, real people. And imagine them making very specific statements.

It's not enough to imagine your nephew saying something like, "She was a generous woman." You need to imagine a second, qualifying sentence, such as, "She always sent me expensive birthday presents."

And be honest. Don't sugarcoat the pill. Say it like it is. For example, your next door neighbor might be saying, "I thought he was a very inconsiderate person. He never picked up the mess when his dog crapped on my lawn."

Imagine everything the people at your funeral could truthfully say about you – and then think about the way their words make you feel.

If you don't feel good, it means that, in those relationships at least, you are not living your life according to your core values.

Now, for every negative statement you just imagined, ask yourself, "What would I like this person to be saying about me?" The answer to that question will reveal your core values for that particular relationship.

The goal of this exercise is to create a set of about a dozen sentences. Each sentence will be a statement that indicates what you think is important in a particular area of your life.

Let's say you imagined someone saying, "He was always struggling to make ends meet." That statement would make you feel bad, right? So then you imagine what you would like that person to say about you, and you might come up with, "He struggled for a while and then everything changed. He became very successful and died a wealthy person." If that statement makes you feel good, it's reasonable to say that acquiring wealth is a core value for you. And you would write it down like this: "I believe that financial success is a valuable and admirable accomplishment."

Got it?

Negative Statement: "He was always struggling to make ends meet."

Positive Statement: "He struggled for a while and then everything changed. He became very successful and died a wealthy person."

Core Value: "I believe that financial success is a valuable and admirable accomplishment."

I recommend that you shoot for about a dozen statements, because you want to address all the major areas of your life:

Your health values
Your wealth values
Your self-improvement (personal) values
Your social happiness values

Why?

Because your core values should determine your goals. And your goals have to be comprehensive.

Most goal-setting programs are not comprehensive. They focus on just one thing. Making more money. Or losing weight. Or being happy (whatever that means). Setting such singular goals can sometimes be effective if you have the flexibility in your schedule to focus on them. But most people don't. And that creates a problem. They start out enthusiastically and make progress for a while. But before long, life's many urgencies push their way in. Good habits are neglected. Bad habits return. Before long, the goal is abandoned.

You are going to avoid that very common problem by considering the full spectrum of your life – not just your health or your wealth but also your hobbies, personal relations, social obligations, and so on.

Here's what you should do now:

Take out a piece of paper and divide it into four boxes.
At the top of those boxes, write Health, Wealth, Self-Improvement, and Social Happiness.
Inside each box, write down statements in that category that you would like to have said about you at your funeral.

For example...

Under Health:

"He was the fittest 80-year-old I ever saw."
"He could run a mile in eight minutes."
"I once saw him lift up a car by its bumper."

Under Wealth:

"Of all the people who graduated from Riverdale High School in 1972, she turned out to be the wealthiest."
"She had a huge mansion in Laguna Beach."
"She left $4 million to charity when she died."

Under Self-Improvement:

"He was the best chess player I ever knew."
"He was also a published poet."
"He knew more about home decorating than Martha Stewart."

Under Social Happiness:

"She was the world's kindest mom."
"She was also a very generous friend."
"She was a strong supporter of breast cancer research."

Write down at least two such statements in each of the four categories. The purpose of writing them down is twofold: to fix them in your mind, and to have something specific you can refer to later.

You will be referring to these core values many times in the coming years. They should be a source of continuous inspiration. Treat them seriously. They are the crux of your master plan.

[Ed. Note: You CAN get out of debt, lose 10 pounds, start a profitable business... or achieve any goal you set your mind to. Take your first step toward success by signing up for ETR's Goal Setting Webinar. Craig Ballantyne will take you through dramatically important vision and goal setting exercises to help you overcome obstacles and get closer to your goals. Get on the fast track to your goals here.]